Guys…Read This

Eph 5:25,26 "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word,"

A couple of months ago, the guys at church had something called "Inside Without". Every year we have a retreat in March that is called "Inside Out" and the guys who lead our men's ministry thought it would be cool to start the new year with a time of prayer and fasting. As a result, we spent a weekend together "Inside Without".

One thing that came from that weekend was a discussion of these verses. What does it mean for us to love our wives as much as Christ loved the church? What does it mean that we are to sanctify her and cleanse her? And how do we do that?

So many times we reflexively say that we are to love our wives as much as Christ loved the church, and that means we have to be willing to die for her. That is true. Jesus gave His life for the church and those of us who are married should be willing to give up our lives for our wives. That is, until we have to do the dishes, or help with the laundry, or spend time talking to our wives instead of watching the game on TV. Then giving up our lives seems little in comparison. We say that we are willing to die, but then we don't die to self. We don't submit. Hey, I thought this submitting thing was for the woman? No. Eph 5:21 says to submit to one another. That means yielding what I want for what she wants...and being thankful about it. (5:20) Let's face it, sometimes death seems easier.

And this loving thing does not end with the willingness to die, it also is proactive. It is my responsibility to make sure that my wife is clean, is pure, is holy, is sanctified (set apart). Jesus did what He could do to make the church clean, we have to do what we can do to make our wives pure. How? "With the washing of water by the word." Sanctified in truth.

This is what hit me that weekend, and it hits me again today. I have to pray with my wife. I have to read the Bible with my wife. And I have to share what God is teaching me with my wife. (That is assuming that I am in the word and being taught. If I am not, then that is a real problem for me, my wife and my family.) For some reason guys are not prone to do this. When we fail to do it, we are not loving our wives like Jesus loved the church. We are negligent. And when we are negligent, our wives are on their own. This is not what God intended.

My take away point today is that I have to be more consistent in sharing what God is teaching me. It doesn't have to be a long dissertation, just a point of conversation. Watch what happens.